Where I've Been

Hiya blog readers. It has been a while. Summer has me in her grips, and she's not letting me go until I out-scarf the hot dog eating champion at Nathan's Famous.

I'll post from time to time this summer. In the meantime, I'd love it if you read my latest piece, a "short imagined monologue", as published at McSweeney's Internet Tendency:

A WOMAN, RETURNING TO THE WORKFORCE AFTER HAVING CHILDREN, ANSWERS A STAR BEHAVIORAL ASSESSMENT JOB INTERVIEW QUESTION.

BY LAURA TOKIE

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The situation was that my second child was going on four and still in diapers. People were starting to talk. I was already “that mom with the biter.” They called my firstborn “The Shark” around the St. Nicholas Daycare. His dental impressions were found on everyone, or so they claimed. I swear one of those kids was biting himself just to get an extra turn on the scooter, but whatever. Eventually they put my boy on the naughty list and kicked him out… hence the employment gap you’ve noted, and The Shark’s complete hatred of Santa Claus.  

Once nursery workers turn on you, you’re under constant surveillance. You pass them in the dairy aisle. They smile sweetly, avoiding eye contact, noting the mismatched socks and the odor of soy sauce as they select their fake butter. ...

Read the full piece here. Fifteen dogs and counting, Laura